My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
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