So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
You ruined the universe
Randomize
