If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
Randomize
