No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
