her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
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