I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Randomize
