Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
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