i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
Holy sore nipples Batman
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
Randomize
