She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
Randomize
