I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Randomize
