I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
