I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Randomize
