you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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