I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
