dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
