I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Randomize