I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Randomize
