i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
