hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize