i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
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