Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
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