I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
Randomize
