his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
He really likes Obama...and Bill Clinton too. He said "I mean, how many presidents can say that they got head in the oval office?"
Soulmates.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Randomize
