Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
I woke up this morning to the buzzer on my oven going off... I cooked fish sticks at 425 degrees for 5 hours last night. my house smells awesome
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
Randomize
