Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
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