no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
Randomize
