your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
Randomize
