"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
I like my sex mixed with concussions.
go do what you do best...puke behind churches
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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