Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
Randomize
