? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
Randomize
