lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Randomize
