capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Randomize
