did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
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