I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
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