i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
Randomize
