so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
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