the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize
