I puked a lego.
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
