how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
Randomize
