like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
Randomize
