I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
