Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
