carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
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