Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
