there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
Randomize
