I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
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