I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
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