Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
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