if i can run in heels then i can drive
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
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