its not stalking. its research.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize
