the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
Randomize
