I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Randomize